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      英語非語言交際身勢語

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      英語非語言交際身勢語

      摘要

      “身勢語”同語言一樣,都是文化的一部分。在不同文化中,身勢語的意義并不完全相同。各民族有不同的非語言交際方式.例如:不同的民族在談話時,對雙方保持多大距離才合適有不同的看法;談話雙方身體接觸的次數多少因文化不同而各異;在目光接觸這一方面也有許多規定:看不看對方,什么時候看,看多久,什么人可以看,什么人不可以看;在某些場合下,在中國和講英語的國家無論微笑還是大笑,通常表示友好﹑贊同﹑滿意﹑高興﹑愉快,但是在某些場合,中國人的笑會引起西方人的反感;打手勢時動作稍有不同,就會與原來的意圖有所區別,對某種手勢理解錯了,也會引起意外的反應等等。因此,要用外語進行有效的交際,在說某種語言時就得了解說話人的手勢,動作,舉止等所表示的意思。而有些權威人士認為兩者相互依存。在大多數情況下這是對的。在某些情況下,人體動作與所說的話不一致,口頭說的與身勢語表達的意思不一樣。這時要借助其他信息或從整個情況中猜測說話人的意思,從某種意義上說,一切身勢語都要放在一定的情景下去理解;忽視了整個情景就會發生誤解。而通過中美身勢語對比研究表明,兩者有相似的地方,也有差異的地方,說明了解另一種語言中身勢語的重要性。可見,真正掌握兩種語言的人在換用另一種語言說話時也要換用另一種身勢語。這樣才能達到更好的交際效果。

      關鍵詞:非語言交際身勢語不同文化不同方式

      BodyLanguageonNonverbalCommunication

      Abstract

      “Bodylanguage”,likeourverballanguage,isalsoapartofourculture.Butnotallbodylanguagemeansthesamethingindifferentcultures.Differentpeoplehavedifferentwaysofmakingnonverbalcommunication.Forexample:differentpeoplehavedifferentideasabouttheproperdistancebetweenpeopleconversing;theappropriatenessofphysicalcontactvarieswithdifferentcultures;onecoulddrawupquitealistof“rules”abouteyecontact:tolookornottolook;whentolookandhowlongtolook;whoandwhonottolookat;smilesandlaughterusuallyconveyfriendliness,approval,satisfaction,pleasure,joyandmerriment,and,thisisgenerallytrueinChinaaswellastheEnglish-speakingcountries,however,therearesituationswhensomeChinesewilllaughthatwillcausenegativereactionsbywesterners;gesturescanbeparticularlytroublesome,foraslightdifferenceinmakingthegestureitselfcanmeansomethingquitedifferentfromthatintended,and,awronginterpretationofagesturecanarousequiteunexpectedreactionsandsoon.Soinordertocommunicateeffectivelyinaforeignlanguage,oneshouldknowalsothegestures,bodymovements,mannerismsandetc.thataccompanyaparticularlanguage.Someauthoritiesfeelthatthetwoaredependentoneachother.Thisiscertainlytrueinmostsituations.Butitisalsotruethatincertainsituationsbodyactioncontradictswhatisbeingsaid,justasthespokenwordsmaymeansomethingquitedifferentfromwhatbodylanguagecommunicates.Whenthisoccurs,onemusttrytogetfurtherinformation,orguessthemeaningfromthecontextofthesituation.Inasense,allbodylanguageshouldbeinterpretedwithinagivencontext;toignoretheoverallsituationcouldbemisleading.AcomparativestudyofChineseandAmericanbodylanguageshowsanumberofsimilaritiesanddiversitiesofbodylanguage.Itshowstheimportanceofknowingthespecificgesturesthatgowithalanguage.Observationshowsthatatrulybilingualpersonswitcheshisbodylanguageatthesametimeheswitcheslanguages.Thismakescommunicationeasierandbetter.

      Butnotallbodylanguagemeansthesamethingindifferentcultures.Differentpeoplehavedifferentwaysofmakingnonverbalcommunication.Theanswerstothequestionsatthebeginningofthischapterareall“no”.Evennoddingtheheadmayhaveadifferentmeaning.ToNepalese,SriLankans,someIndiansandsomeEskimositmeansnot“yes”,but“no”.Soinordertocommunicateeffectivelyinaforeignlanguage,oneshouldknowalsothegestures,bodymovements,mannerismsandetc.thataccompanyaparticularlanguage.

      Bodylanguageisanimportantmediathroughwhichpeoplecommunicatewitheachother.Itreferstothepatternsoffacialexpressionsandgesturesthatpeopleusetoexpresstheirfeelingsincommunication.Thespecialistonbodylanguageresearch—Fen.Lafle.Angles,oncesaid:"Onceitwaslost,ababycouldnthavegrownintoanormalperson".Itsalsotruetothejuveniles.Inschooleducation,bodylanguageplaysapositiveroleincultivatingthestudentscharacters.

      3.Theconcretetypesandapplicationofthebodylanguage

      3.1Typesofbodylanguage

      3.1.1Distancebetweenpeopleconversing

      WatchanArabandanEnglishmaninconversation.TheArab,showingfriendlinessinthemannerofhispeople,willstandclosetotheEnglishman.Thelatterwillmoveback,watchingtotheEnglishman.TheArabwillthenmoveforwardtobecloser;theEnglishmanwillkeepmovingbackward.Bytheendoftheconversation,thetwomaybequiteadistancefromtheconversation;thetwomaybequiteadistancefromtheplacewheretheywereoriginallystanding!

      Here,distancebetweenthetwoisthekeyfactor.Differentpeoplehavedifferentideasabouttheproperdistancebetweenpeopleconversing.Accordingtostudies,itseemstherearefourmaindistancesinAmericansocialandbusinessrelations:intimate,personal,social,andpublic.Intimatedistancerangesfromdirectphysicalcontacttoadistanceofabout45centimeters;thisisforpeople’smostprivaterelationsandactivities,betweenmanandwife,forexample.Personaldistanceisabout45—80centimetersandismostcommonwhenfriends,acquaintancesandrelativesconverse.Socialdistancemaybeanywherefromabout1.30metersto3meters;peoplewhoworktogether,orpeopledoingbusiness,aswellasmostofthoseinconversationatsocialgatheringstendtokeepadistanceisfartherthananyoftheaboveandisgenerallyforspeakersinpublicandforteachersinclassrooms.

      TheimportantthingtokeepinmindisthatmostEnglish-speakingpeopledonotlikepeopletobetooclose.Beingtoofarapart,ofcourse,maybeawkward,butbeingtooclosemakespeopleuncomfortable,unlessthereisareason,suchasshowingaffectionorencouragingintimacy.Butthatisanothermatter.

      3.1.2Physicalcontact

      Theappropriatenessofphysicalcontactvarieswithdifferentcultures.Figuresfromastudyofferinterestinginsightintothismatter.Pairsofindividualssittingandchattingincollegeshopsindifferentplaceswereobservedforatlastonehoureach.Thenumberoftimesthateitheronetouchedtheotherinthatonehourwasrecorded,asfollows:London,0;Gainesville,Florida,2;Pairs,10;SanJuan,PuertoRico,180.Thesefiguresspeakforthemselves.(Robinett,1978)

      InEnglish-speakingcountries,physicalcontactisgenerallyavoidedinconversationamongordinaryfriendsoracquaintances.Merelytouchingsomeonemaycauseanunpleasantreaction.Ifonetouchesanotherpersonaccidentally,he/sheusuallyuttersanapologysuchas“Sorry,Oh,I’msorry,Excuseme.”

      InChina,acommoncomplaintofwesternmothersisthatChineseoftenfondletheirbabiesandverysmallchildren.Suchbehavior—whethertouching,patting,huggingorkissing—canbequiteembarrassingandawkwardforthemothers.Theyknowthatnoharmismeant,andthatsuchgesturesaremerelysignsoffriendlinessoraffection,thereforetheycannotopenlyshowtheirdispleasure.Ontheotherhand,suchactionsintheirownculturewouldbeconsideredrude,intrusiveandoffensiveandcouldarouseastrongdislikeandevenrepugnance.Sothemothersoftenstandbyandwatchinawkwardsilence,withmixedemotions,evenwhenthefondlingisbyChinesefriendsoracquaintances.

      Goingbeyondthemilderformsoftouching,weshalltakeupthematterofhuggingandembracinginpublic.Thispracticeisfairlycommonamongwomeninmanycountries.Andinmostofthemoreindustrializedcountries,itoccursfrequentlybetweenhusbandandwifeandclosemembersofthefamilywhenmeetingafteraperiodofabsence.Huggingandembracingamongmen,however,isadifferentmatter.AmongArabs,Russians,French,andinseveraloftheeastEuropeanandMediterraneancountries,awarmhugandakissonthecheeksareastandardwayofwelcome.ThesameistruewithsomeLatinAmericans.InEastAsiaandintheEnglish-speakingcountries,though,thepracticeisseldomseen.Asimplehandshakeisthecustom.ThestoryistoldofwhathappenednotlongagowhentheJapaneseprimeministeratthetime,Mr.Fukuda,wenttotheU.S.onastatevisit.Whenhesteppedoutofhiscarinfrontofthewhitehouse,hewasgreetedbytheAmericanpresidentwhita“bearhug”.Theprimeministerwasflabbergasted;othersoftheJapanesedelegationwereamazed;manyAmericansweresurprised—itwassounusualandsounexpected.IfthepresidenthadbowedlowinJapanesefashion,itwouldhavebeenlessasurprisethantobegreetedinawaysouncommonineithercountry!

      ThematterofphysicalcontactbetweenmembersofthesamesexinEnglish-speakingcountriesisadelicateone.Oncepastchildhood,theholdingofhands,orwalkingwithanarmaroundanother’sshoulderisnotconsideredproper.Theimplicationishomosexuality,andhomosexualitygenerallyarousesstrongsocialdisapprovalinthesecountries.

      3.1.3Eyecontact

      Eyecontactisanimportantaspectofbodylanguage.Onecoulddrawupquitealistof“rules”abouteyecontact:tolookornottolook;whentolookandhowlongtolook;whoandwhonottolookat.ThesepassagesfromthebookBodyLanguage(Fast,1971)areamusingaswellasinformative:

      “Towstrangersseatedacrossfromeachotherinarailwaydiningcarhavetheoptionofintroducingthemselvesandfacingamealofinconsequentialandperhapsboringtalk,orignoringeachotheranddesperatelytryingtoavoideachother’sglance.Awriter,describingsuchasituationinanessay,wrote,‘theyre-readthemenu,theyfoolwiththecutlery,estheinevitablemomentwhenglancesmeet,buttheymeetonlytoshootinstantlyawayandoutthewindowforanintentviewofthepassingscene.’”

      Hepointsoutthatwithpeoplewhoareunfamiliar:

      “Wemustvoidstaringatthem,andyetwemustalsoavoidignoringthem…Welookatthemlongenoughtomakeitquiteclearthatweseethem,andthenweimmediatelylookaway.

      Therearedifferentformulasfortheexchangeofglancesdependingonwherethemeetingtakesplace.Ifyoupasssomeoneinthestreetyoumayeyetheoncomingpersontillyouareabouteightfeetapart,thenyoumustlookawayasyoupass.Beforetheeight-footdistanceisreached,eachwillsignalinwhichdirectionhewillpass.Thisisdonewithabrieflookinthatdirection.Eachwillveerslightly,andthepassingisdonesmoothly.”

      Inconversationswithpeoplewhoknoweachother,however,Americancustomdemandsthatthereshouldbeeyecontact.Thisappliestoboththespeakerandthelistener.Foreitheronenottolookattheotherpersoncouldimplyanumberofthings,amongwhicharefear,contempt,uneasiness,guilt,indifference,eveninpublicspeakingthereshouldbeplentyofeyecontact.Foraspeakerto“burryhisnoseinhismanuscript”,toreadaspeechinsteadoflookingatandtalkingtohidaudience,assomeChinesespeakersareinthehabitofdoing,wouldberegardedasinconsiderateanddisrespectful.

      Inconversation,apersonshowsthatheislisteningbylookingattheotherperson’seyesorface.Iftheotherpersonisspeakingatsomelength,thelistenerwilloccasionallymakesoundslike“Hmm”,“Ummm”,ornodhisheadtoindicatehisattention.Ifheagreeswiththespeaker,hemaynodorsmile.Ifhedisagreesorhassomereservations,hemayslanthisheadtooneside,raiseaneyebrow,haveaquizzicallook.

      StaringatpeopleorholdingaglancetoolongisconsideredimproperinEnglish-speakingcountries.Evenwhenthelookmaybeoneofappreciation—asofbeauty—itmaymakepeopleuneasyandembarrassed.ManyAmericanstravelingabroadfindthestaresofthelocalpeopleirritating.Theybecomeextremelyself-consciousandoftenendupquiteindignantaboutthe“rudeness”ofthepeoplethere,notrealizingthatthepracticemaybequitecommoninthecountryandmaybenothingmorethancuriosity.ManyEnglish-speakingpeopleinchinahaveheardtocomplainaboutthis.

      “Thelanguageoftheeyes”—oneofthemostcommonandancientwaysofexchangingfeelingsbetweenboysandgirls,menandwomen—isespeciallyelaborateintheUnitedStates.Muchstudyhasbeenmadeofthis:howpeopleoftheoppositesexshowinterestorindifference,encouragementordiscouragement,approvalordisapproval,affectionoraversion.However,therearemanydifferencesevenwithintheUnitedStates.Menusetheireyesindifferentwaysthanwomen;therearedifferencesofage,classorsocialstatusandgeographicalregion;therearedifferencesofethnicbackground.

      ThestoryistoldofateenagePuertoRicangirlinaNewYorkhighschoolwhowastakenwithanumberofothergirlstotheprincipalforsuspectedsmoking.Althoughtherewasnoproofofanywrongdoingandalthoughshehadagoodrecord,theprincipaldecidedshewasguiltyandsuspendedher.“Therewassomethingslyandsuspiciousabouther,”hesaidinhisreport.“Shejustwouldn’tmeetmyeye.Shewouldn’tlookatme.”

      Whenshewasquestionedbytheprincipalitwastruethatshekeptstaringatthefloorandrefusedtomeethiseye.AndinEnglishthereisasaying“Don’ttrustanyonewhowon’tlookatyouintheeye.”

      ItsohappenedthatoneoftheteachershadaLatinAmericanbackgroundandknewaboutPuertoRicanculture.Aftertalkingwiththegirl’sparents,hewenttotheprincipalandexplainedthataccordingtoPuertoRicanculture,agoodgirl“doesnotmeettheeyesofanadult.”Suchbehavior,heexplained,“isasignofrespectandobedience.”

      Fortunately,theprincipalacceptedtheexplanation,admittedhismistakeandthematterwassettledproperly.Thisdifferenceininterpretingasimpleeyegesturewasalessoninculturaldiversitythathewouldnoteasilyforget.

      Rulesabouteye-languagearenumerousandcomplex.Whathasbeenmentionedgivesagoodideaofthis;weshallnotgofurtherintodetail.

      3.1.4Smilesandlaughter

      Smilesandlaughterusuallyconveyfriendliness,approval,satisfaction,pleasure,joyandmerriment.ThisisgenerallytrueinChinaaswellastheEnglish-speakingcountries.However,therearesituationswhensomeChinesewilllaughthatwillcausenegativereactionsbywesterners.Toillustrate,hereisanexcerptfromaletterbyanAmericantoaChinesefriendonnonverbalgesturesthatoftencausecross-culturalmisunderstanding:

      “…OneisthedifferentmeaningoflaughterinChinaandAmerican.WhenanAmericanisparkinghisbicycle,forexample,andthebicycleaccidentallyfallsover,hefeelsembarrassedathisawkwardness,andisquiteangeredandhumiliatedwhenChineseonlookerslaugh.Ihaveseenthesamethinghappeninthediningroom,whenaforeignerdropsaplatequitebyaccidentandfeelsbadlyandChineseonlookerslaugh,compoundinghisdiscomfortandcausingangerandbadfeeling.”

      Suchlaughter,ofcourse,isnotatthepersonorhismisfortune—whetherhebeaforeigneroraChinese.Itcanconveyanumberoffeelings:don’ttakeitsoseriously;laughitoff,it’snothing;suchthingscanhappentoanyofus,etc.However,forpeopleunawareofthisattitude,thereactiontosuchlaughterisusuallyquiteunpleasantandoftengeneratesillfeelingtowardsthoselaughing.

      3.1.5Gestures

      Gesturescanbeparticularlytroublesome,foraslightdifferenceinmakingthegestureitselfcanmeansomethingquitedifferentfromthatintended.Awronginterpretationofagesturecanarousequiteunexpectedreactions.

      Awell-knowncaseisagesturemadebyWinstonChurchill,thedoughtyprimeministerwholedBritainthroughtheSecondWorldWar.Asheappearedbeforealargecrowd,hewasgreetedwithcheersandapplause.TheoccasionwasamomentousoneandChurchillflashedthe“Vforvictory”sign—withtheforefingerandmiddlefingerraisedtoforma“V”.Whetherbymistakeorignorance,insteadoffacingthepalmofhishandtothefront,hemadethe“V”withthebackofhishandtowardstheaudience.Someinthecrowdapplauded;somegasped;somebrokeoutinlaughter.Theprimeminister’sgesture,asgiven,meantquitesomethingelse.Insteadof“Vforvictory”,itmeantsomethingdirty;itwasanobscenegesture!

      3.2Applicationofthebodylanguage

      3.2.1Greetings

      HoahasjustarrivedfromVietnam.HercousinPhuongandsomeofhisAmericanfriendsarewaitingattheairporttogreether.HoaandPhuongarebothexcitedaboutthismeetingbecausetheyhavebeenseparatedforsevenyears.AssoonasHoaentersthepassengerterminal,PhuongintroduceshertohisfriendsTom,Don,andCharles.TomstepsforwardandhugsandkissesHoa.Shepusheshimawayandburstsintotears.

      AmongChinesefromVietnam,ifaboyhugsandkissesagirlinpublic,heinsultsher.ChinesecultureinVietnamisverystrictaboutthis,especiallyintheruralareaswhereHoagrewup.Shedescribedhervillage:“Afterchildrenaretenyearsold,boysandgirlscannotplaytogether.Aboyandgirlcannotdatewithouttheirparents’approval.Amanandwomancannothugorkissifthey’renotmarried.”

      InHoa’svillageifanyoneviolatedtheserules,thevillagerspunishedthegirlbyforcinghertokneelonthegroundsotheycouldspitatherandthrowrocksather.NowonderthatPuong’sAmericanfriendsfrightenedHoa.Shedidnotknowwhatpunishmentforpublichuggingandkissingmightbemetedouttoherinthiscountry.SheconfusedTom,whobyAmericanstandardswasdongtherightthing.

      EventuallyHoalearnedtobecomfortablewhengreetedwithhugsandkisses,acceptingthemasmerelyperfunctoryacts.

      AnalogoustothissituationisanotherinwhichDuane,aChineseAmericanemployee,invitedhisnon-Chineseboss,Mr.Keck,toalargefamilycelebration.WhenMr.Keckarrived,heshookhandswithDuaneand,whenintroducedtoDuane’sgrandmother,leanedoverandkissedheronthecheek.Thisshockedtheolderwoman,yetMr.Keckwastotallyunawarethathehadcommittedasocialblunder.Whatheconsideredasarespectfulact,grandmotherconsidereddisrespectful.Instead,Mr.Keckshouldhavenoddedtotheolderwomanandofferedheraverbalgreeting.

      WhenestablishingrelationswithAsians,avoidbodycontact.Thesafestformistonodandgiveaverbalsalutation.Followtheirleadastherelationshipchanges.

      Likecustomseverywhere,increasedcross-culturalinteractionbringsaboutchangesinhabits;manyAsianbusinesspeoplehaveaccommodatedtotheAmericanhandshakingtradition.Ontheotherhand,inasituationwhereitseemsasifbowingwouldstillbetheonlypolitemovetomake—especiallytotheJapanese—followingtheseguidelinesshouldmakeiteasier.

      WhenbowingtopeoplefromJapan,handsshouldslidedowntowardthekneesorremainattheside.

      Backandneckshouldbeheldinarigidposition,whileeyeslookdownward.

      Thepersonintheinferiorpositionalwaysbowslongerandlower.

      ThosefromIndia,SriLanka,andBangladeshusethenamasteforbothgreetingandfarewellsandasasignofrespect.Theydothisbyholdingtheirhandschest-highinaprayerlikeposition,thenslightlynodthehead;buttheydonotbow.AmericanstudentsofyogawhoaretaughtbyAsianteachersbecomefamiliarwiththisgesturethatheraldsthebeginningofeachsession.Thaishaveasimilargreeting,buttheycallitawai.

      WhilebodycontactisgenerallytabooinmostAsiancountries,elsewhere,bodycontactisexpected;shyingawayfromcontactgivesoffnegativesignals.

      Whengreeting,peoplefromIndian,SriLanka,Bangladesh,andThailandholdtheirhandstogetherinfrontoftheirchinsinaprayerlikepositionandnodtheirheads.

      Whengreeting,mostLatinosexpectbodycontact.Huggingandkissingonthecheckareacceptableforboththesamesexandtheoppositesex.Theabrazoiscommonplace—friendsembraceandsimultaneouslypateachotherontheback.

      Whengreeting,mostmiddleeasterners,especiallyMuslims,avoidbodycontactwiththeoppositesex,butmenmayembraceandkissoneanther.Womenmaydothesame.Whenshakinghands,menshouldavoidpullingtheirhandsawaytooquickly.

      WhengreetingmostAmericans,expectsomabodycontract.Womenkissonceoneachcheekandhug;menshakehands.Menmayalsohugandkisswomenonthecheekiftheyareclosefriends.

      WhengreetingorthodoxJews,avoidbodycontactwiththeoppositesex.

      3.2.2Signsofaffection

      ShereeBykofsky,anAmericanwriter,isthrilledwhenacruiseshiplinepurchasescopiesofherhewromantictravelguide,thebestplacetokissinandaroundNewYorkCity.Thecruiselineplanstogivethebooksasdinnerfavorsduringtheirspecialvalentine’scruise.

      TheyinviteShereeonboardtogreetthepassengersandautographtheircopies.TheAmericansandEuropeansdelightinmeetingtheauthorandhavinghersigntheirbooks.However,whenShereevisitsthetablesoftheJapanesepassengers,mostofthemrefusetoacknowledgeher.

      Japanesepeopledonotapproveofpublicbodycontactand,thus,havedevelopedacomplexsystemofbowingtoexpressrelationships.Touchingamemberoftheoppositesexisparticularlyrepugnanttotheirsensitivities;consequently,kissinginpublicisconsideredadisgracefulact.

      TheJapanesesnubbedShereebecausethetitleofherbooksuggestedbehaviorthatdidnotconformtotheirstandardsofrespect.Theywouldnotacknowledgeherbecause,intheireyes,shepromotedvulgarity.

      AsiansfromcountriesotherthanJapanareequallydisapprovingwhentheyseeAmericanmenandwomenortwomentowalkinpublicholdinghands.However,whentheypracticethissignoffriendshipinthestates,theyarefrequentlymistakenforhomosexuals.Thisshocksthem.

      Same-sexhandholdingorwalkingarm-in-armalsooccursamongLatinos,French,Spanish,Italians,Greeks,andmiddleeasterners.

      MostJapanesepeoplestronglydisapproveofpublicexpressionofaffectionbymalesandfemalesthroughkissingoranyotherformofbodycontact.

      Same-sexhandholdingbetweenAsians,middle-easterners,Latinos,orthosefromMediterraneancountriesisasignoffriendship.Walkingwitharmsoneachother’sshouldersorwithhandsorarmslinkedalsoequateswithcamaraderie.

      3.2.3Physicalcontact

      WhenDorothyreceivesaweddinginvitationtoattendherJapaneseneighbor’swedding,sheisthrilled.ShehasalwaysadmiredtheYamashitafamily.Sheisveryfondoflance,theabout-to-be-marriedson,andfeelsextremelyclosetoGrace,hismother.Dorothyfeelshonoredtobeincludedinthefamilyfestivities.

      Afterthebeautifulchurchceremony,Dorothystandsinlinetogreetthebridalparty.However,whenDorothy,averyaffectionateperson,stepsforwardtoembracethemotherofthegroom,Gracestepsbackward.

      Dorothyfeelsrejected.

      Evenatsuchajoyousoccasionasawedding,Japanesecustomsaboutphysicalcontactinpublicarenotrelaxed,evenwhentakingplacebetweenthesamesex.Truly,moreformalityisdemonstratedinsuchsituations.Considertheextremereservedisplayedatthe1993royalweddingofcrownprinceNaruhitotoMassakoOwada.Thephysicalactsoftheroyalcoupleconsistedonlyofsippingsacredsakeandmakingbows—notouching,nohugging,nokissingbetweenthecouple,certainlynonebytheweddingguests.

      InDorothy’ssituation,eventhoughshefeltveryclosetoGrace,shewouldhavebeenmoresociallycorrecthadshebowedherheadslightlyandthenofferedonlyverbalfelicitations.Insituationslikethese,itisbesttoobservethemannerinwhichotherweddingguestscongratulatefamilymembersandthenfollowtheirexample.

      3.3AcomparativestudyofChineseandAmericanbodylanguage

      AcomparativestudyofChineseandAmericanbodylanguageshowsanumberofsimilarities;forexample:mendon’thugorembracewhenmeeting;ahandshakeisthemostcommongesturethatgoeswithagreeting;wavingahandtosay“goodbye”isthesame;afrownshowsdispleasure,andthewrinklingofone’snoseisasignofdislike,disgustordisapproval;noddingmeans“yes”,andshakingone’sheadmeans“no”;poutinghasthesamemeaning—displeasure,badhumor,resentment;apatonthebackofamanorboyindicatesapproval,praise,encouragement;grittingone’steethmayexpressanger,fury,ordetermination.

      Thechartsonthefollowingpagesprovideexamplesofsomeofthedifference:

      DifferentBodyLanguage,SameMeaning

      MeaningBodyLanguageinChinaBodyLanguageinU.S.

      “Comehere”(beckoningsomeonetocome)handextendedtowardperson,openpalm,palmdown,withallfingerscrookedinabeckoningmotionhandextendedtowardperson,closedhand,palmup,withforefingeronlymovingbackandforth(inchinathissamegesturewouldbeconsideredoffensivebymany)

      “Shameonyou!”(semi-jokinggesture)forefingerofonehandextended,tiptouchesone’sownfaceseveraltimesquickly;similartoscratching,butwiththeforefingerstraight(usuallywiththeremark“shameonyou!”)forefingerofeachhandextended,palmsdowninfrontofone’sbody;oneforefingermakesseveralbrushingmovementsoverthebackoftheotherforefinger

      ‘I’mveryfull”(afterameal)oneorbothhandsopen,lightlypattingone’sownstomachhandraisedtothroat,fingersextended,palmdown(oftenwiththeremark“I’mfulluptohere.”)

      SameBodyLanguageinTowCultures

      butwithDifferentMeaning

      MeaninginChinaBodyLanguageMeaninginU.S.

      anger,irritation,frustration,remorsestampingone’sfootimpatience

      thankyou;mutualpositivefeelingsspeakerorperformerclappingatsametimeaudienceapplaudsapplaudingoneself;improper,immodest

      Keywords:nonverbalcommunicationbodylanguagedifferentculturedifferentways

      Contents

      1.Introduction……1

      2.Thenecessityandimportanceoflearningbodylanguageonnonverbalcommunication……2

      3.Theconcretetypesandapplicationofthebodylanguage……3

      3.1Typesofbodylanguage……3

      3.1.1Distancebetweenpeopleconversing……3

      3.1.2Physicalcontact……3

      3.1.3Eyecontact……4

      3.1.4Smilesandlaughter……6

      3.1.5Gestures……6

      3.2Applicationofthebodylanguage……6

      3.2.1Greetings……6

      3.2.2Signsofaffection……8

      3.2.3Physicalcontactinlife……8

      3.3AcomparativestudyofChineseandAmericanbodylanguage……9

      4.Conclusion……12

      1.Introduction

      WhenaChineseconverseswithaCanadianorAmericanfriendoftheoppositesex,woulditbeindecenttobelookingattheotherperson?

      Iftwoyoungfriendsofthesamesexwalkwiththeirarmsaroundeachother’sshouldersorholdhands,wouldthisberegardedbyEnglish-speakingpeopleasproper?

      Doesnoddingtheheadmean“yes”,andshakingtheheadmean“no”inallcultures?

      Therearenotquestionsaboutlanguage,butaboutbodylanguage,aboutnonverbalcommunication.

      Nonverbalcommunication,composedofpictures,dresses,eyecontact,spatialsignals,gesturesandsoon,isasimportantasverbalcommunication.

      Peoplecommunicateinmanydifferentways.Oneofthemostimportantways,ofcourse,isthroughlanguage.Moreover,whenlanguageiswrittenitcanbecompletelyisolatedfromthecontextinwhichitoccurs;itcanbetreatedasifitwereanindependentandself-containedprocess.

      Likeallanimals,peoplecommunicatebytheiractionsaswellasbythenoisestheymake.Itisasortofbiologicalanomalyofman—somethinglikethegiraffe’sneck,orthepelican’sbeak—thatourvocalnoiseshavesoforoutgrowninimportanceandfrequencyallourothermethodsofsignalingtooneanother.Languageisobviouslyessentialforhumanbeings,butitisnotthewholestoryofhumancommunication.Notbyalongshot.

      Thestudyofnonverbalcommunicationshouldbecomplementarytothestudyoflanguage.Theunderstandingofoneshouldbehelpfulinthefurtherunderstandingoftheother.Someauthoritiesfeelthatthetwoaredependentoneachother.Thisiscertainlytrueinmostsituations.Butitisalsotruethatincertainsituationbodyactioncontradictswhatisbeingsaid,justasthespokenwordsmaymeansomethingquitedifferentfromwhatnonverbalcommunicationcommunicates.Whenthisoccurs,onemusttrytogetfurtherinformation,orguessthemeaningfromthecontextofthesituation.Inacase,allnonverbalcommunicationshouldbeinterpretedwithinagivencontext;toignoretheoverallsituationcouldbemisleading.

      2.Thenecessityandimportanceoflearningbodylanguageonnonverbalcommunication

      Althoughwemaynotrealizeit,whenweconversewithotherswecommunicatebymuchmorethanwords.Byourexpressions,gesturesandotherbodymovementswesendmessagestothesearoundusasmileandanoutstretchedhandshowwelcome.Aformisasignofdispleasure.Noddingone’sheadmeansagreement—“Yes”.Wavinganoutstretchedhandwithopenpalmisthegesturefor“goodbye”.Leaningbackinone’sseatandyawningatatalkorlectureshowslackofinterest,boredom.Thesegestureshavecometobeacceptedingeneralashavingthemeaningsmentioned,atlasttoChineseandAmericans.Therearepartsofthewayinwhichwecommunicate.This“bodylanguage”,likeourverballanguage,isalsoapartofourculture.

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